i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
I think I would be able to remember how to smoke but I can't seem to remember how to breathe.
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
You spilled spaghetti on the floor, and kept telling the noodles to "settle down" as you tried to clean it up
When did it seem like a good idea to do pull ups off the balcony? After beer 5 or shot 7?
Dude, she brought over peach cobbler, weed and alcohol plus I'm gonna get laid. She's by far the coolest sister you have.
I don't want to hear about you making out with a high schooler. I just had the best sex of my life. My face and arms went numb in the middle of it.
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
I found a fingernail in my vagina. A fingernail.
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
I'm sorry, you're actually right. Ostrich racing happens, and they're ridden like a horse. Bewildered and distraught.
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
Imma make him fuck me with my jersey on tonight while I chant Go Jets Go. Gotta love playoff hockey szn.
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
Randomize
