what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
beer pong: waldo and ernie vs. bacon and eggs... i love halloween
I swear it's like I have a jerk off quota I have to meet each week. If I miss three days I have a wet dream and it's like a wasted jizz, and it gets everywhereeeeeee.
you kept saying 'can i put my penis on the grill?' and it was all i could do to stop you. you're welcome, though
Nah the bridesmaids all had dates. I slept with the next best thing: girl who WANTED to be a bridesmaid but didnt make the cut.
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
there is vomit in the pocket of my dress coat. i remember thinking "this is a weird place to puke" at some point in the evening, but i dont understand how i did this.
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
In other news, the one guy I DIDN'T have sex with in High School is now famous.
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
Randomize
