well recently, every guy I have hooked up with has been economy sized
I just met a guy from Australia at the bar. I asked him what it was like down under and he told me if I went home with him he'd let me find out. I love Australians.
don't bother texting me at 10. my pants WILL be off and I'm not putting them back on to come see you.
walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
The gyno asked how many partners i've had... I said ummmm she goes ok then i'll just put down ten.
Before you become official, we should get a hotel room and fuck our brains out. Sort of like a going away party for your penis.
I cried singing "call me maybe" on the way home from the bar. What the fuck
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
BITCH I AM EXPERIENCING THE FEMININE MYSTERY SHUT UP AND GIVE ME DRUGS
I'm 4,715,723% sure I don't give a fuck.
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
I think I won an award for shitting and vomiting at the same time.
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
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