Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
I am now the only person in my apartment who hasn't had sex in my bed.
I feel bad for her, but I feel like she's one of those resource-raping alien civilizations that visits planets, decimates them and then leaves. Those really aren't the qualities I appreciate in a friend. Ya know?
I plan on just grabbing someone's dick if I have to. They will know what's up. Why else do you go to a bar alone on valentines day?
I'm drunk at 3:28
I'm jealous as shit at 3:34
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
You are the best. Or certainly adequate for tempering my unholy desires.
That's the nicest thing you've ever said to me.
We could never date. He doesn't drink and he won't bring me tacos after sex. He's on that healthy life bullshit.
I feel slightly un-patriotic right now... I just got cock blocked by the Air Force!
Is it ironic that our divorce court is a block from where we had our reception? Or is it just sad? Alanis has confused my understanding of irony.
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
Everyone needs to leave the house so I can use the good vibrator without being judged.
Randomize
