Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
We haven't even started dating yet but I already decided I'm going to cheat on her
I came over to his house for a party and realized I was quoted on the fridge... "How'd I get rug burn on my face?" And yes, my name was right next to it!
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
Put you drinking hat aside for Tuesday. My buddy is bartending!
I just puked in my drinking hat.
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
Saw a girl on a walk of shame bend down and look in a pizza box by a trash can to see if there was still a slice left. That's when you know
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
You ruined a cute cat because your lack of horniness
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
Im drinking a CAN of bud light at the bar. Do you really think I care anymore?
Randomize
