so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
Of course she's mad at you. You Kanye Wested a picture of her catching snowflakes in her mouth. "imma let you finish but..." was the shaft and you put two of Kanye West's heads for the balls.
what's the name of the guy at the bank you blew to get the lower interest rate?
um. wrong number, but good luck with your loan
You coulda licked the floor this morning and got drunk.
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
I'm sobbing to NWA
I convinced her that there were two p's in Chipotle - the 2nd one was silent.
I called 911 when they kicked me out of the bar last night.
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
Okay I'm officially a Texan now, I banged a dude with cowboy boots
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
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