eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth
I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
N I'm drinking this invention I call "do-it-fluid" I had a bottle of vodka that was 3/4th empty, so I put in 1/4th rum, 1/4th tequila, 1/4th whisky... it's definitely the worst idea ever..
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
There's a burrito next to my bed. Did you buy it for me or is the Chipotle fairy real? And why am I naked?
I'm by myself. some Midwest chick is hitting on me because I gave her a deviled egg. I need the distraction.
I will most likely miss you the least and fondly remember you as Mr. "I need a minute" but really need 24 hours and 4 extra inches.
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
On a side note. I slept with a stuffed giraffe last night. Found it in my bed when I came home and snuggled with it. Drunk me reverted to being 2
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
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