Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
I don't even have to sign up for karaoke at duncans anymore. The karaoke ppl just sign me up themselves. Without my consent. I also sang stacys mom to some lady named Stacy who's mom died yesterday.
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
i feel like everytime i say im going to quit drinking someone comes along with a better idea about drinking
Apparently I was so drunk I threw my entire wallet at the stripper on stage. That was the third time I should've gotten kicked out.
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
Man my junk looks like a mangled grapefruit right now, this shit sucks.
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
Remind me to talk to you about nipple clamps.
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
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