:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
i told the bartender last night that if the palace saloon made a calendar he would be every month.
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
Happiness is the polar opposite of catching your dad watching holiday themed porn
I made a Wendy's employee say fuck this and quit because I started flipping out due to a baked potato shortage. Of course I had a good night
You were pouring Patron into the window of the squad car trying to get the police dog to drink it
So thats why that cop beat my ass?
Probably
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
My phone just said I texted someone at 430a and said let's fight. Then I texted them an hour later and said thanks.
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
Pray for me.. I'm like the lonely vagina in a sea of sworming dicks
Randomize
