I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
I just found 3 condoms in my math textbook... in the probability section... Under dependent and independent events...
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
I tried calming him down but his eyes are rolling to the back of his head and he's yelling "COMA WEED!"
gay flight attendant. racoons. kegels. bartender with missing teeth. too many birthdays. fucckk.
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
So I bought some random chick a shot she puked in her hands then I watched her make out with my roommate
Just got a groupon for a segway rental: fireworks segway battle at my house. What say you?
No matter how drunk I am or how drunk I'll ever be I love you
He showed up to a booty call with 2 tea bags, but no condom...
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
She woke up next me in bed and told me to stop driving so fast.
I met up with trey last night. He whispered in my ear "I love you" then raised his voice and said "but not in a I want to marry you kind of way, but if you died I would cry."
Randomize
