I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
phone sex would be way better if there was an app for that...
She's sitting on the couch buck naked, eating a cupcake for dinner. I'm breaking new ground as a parent here.
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
oh god my hair smells like rotten vegetables, sweat, and tequila. I wanna party with your neighbors every night.
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
You were so drunk last night you left the bar to go buy a razor so you could go home with him
Just skate-of-shamed, shirtless, with a bucket or margaritas. Good luck beating that one.
The bathroom smells like ribs. What did you do?
I woke up in my tom cruise outfit with my house key tied to my thong....
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO BLAST VANESSA CARLTON IN YOUR CAR AT MIDNIGHT TO FEEL AGAIN. IDK.
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
His face matches his life choices. Both are train wrecks.
No one can touch me, I'm made of fruit.
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