i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
the best part was when he threw his debit card on the table, looked at everyone and said "turn this into pizza!" It felt like a scene in a 'coming of age' teen comedy.
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
I only keep her as my best friend so she wont hook up with my ex.
I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on.
you can officially check off peeing off the 5th floor while shouting "I want to break the guinness world record for longest piss stream" off your college to do list.
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
Which I'm also surprisingly fine with. If he walked into the bedroom naked, holding a fish in one hand and a lit candle in the other and said "Let's get fucking weird." I'd probably go with it. He's just that hot.
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
This bar smells like your ball sack. In a weird way I miss you.
I was gonna jerk off, but then I thought about that movie last night and it killed that idea. I have serious boner trauma.
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
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