hey im gonna send you a picture of my dinner
if its a picture of your dick again we are no longer friends
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
we decided it was best to cut you off after we caught you trying to "baptize" my cat in the jungle juice
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
Just had a shirt made that says "I'm sorry" going to wear it every sat and sun morning for the foreseeable future
Found an old burrito under my bed
You are a sick fuck
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
next time you go get food at three am and leave a rando here can you warn me??? Also i tazed him. but it was just my little one so i think he'll be fine. bring me some fries.
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
I don't know who he was but he was covered up with a shower curtain and ate a whole bottle of tums
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
I need to take my iPad to the Apple store (when this is all over). Do I need to delete all my dick pics/videos or are they used to stumbling across that sort of thing?
Randomize
