and by charming I mean he has a horse cock.
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
while 90% of the female population goes to worship a fictional character tonight at midnight, I will be taking advantage of having the bars ALL TO MYSELF.
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
Highlight of the day: realizing the man in the car next to mine was getting road head... at 2:45pm... nicely done sir, nicely done.
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
I tackled a mailbox like a linebacker. He almost broke his hip and his friend lit a bottle rocket off inside of the car. Yes it was a successful night.
It's not meant to be. I also just shot a turkey baster of gin into Nate's eye, so....
doing shots of $6 a bottle whiskey and chasing it with milk. my own personal way of saying fuck life.
I deleted my history right in front of my girlfriend w/out her seeing. Let's go skydiving with no parachutes. I can live thru anything.
There is someone hissing in the hallway. Not even a typo. Not pissing. Hissing. Like a large cat. Or a komodo dragon.
I wish more of my problems were easily solvable by taking a good long shit.
I feel like my vagina was just in a fistfight.
Randomize
