it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
he asked me to help him wrap his girlfriends birthday presents. Dont worry we fucked right after.
Oh please tell me that I'm sleeping in your shower and not the neighbor's again
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
One day, tell me please to stop buying shots when I'm overwhelmed. I might have just broken a tooth
Here is your half hour reminder. Meet you at emergency room.
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
And then the templeton police were like "oh I remember her, yeah the blue haired girl that we picked up cause she was passed out drunk on the side of the road"
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
i now regret my decision on turning down your offer of sex in the backseat
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
We need a signal or code word for "I basically shaved my whole body and we should touch each other tonight".
We blew shit up to. With a cannon.
Randomize
