i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
Are you for fucking real.? He divorced me just because he got a fucking girlfriend.?!
dude i've broken up a marriage, I think I can handle a simple engagement.
Also, never say you're cool with a threesome if they ask. That shit's a trap.
It just hurt to pee because he was fingering for fucking gold in there.
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
I have the perfect view of a sexy blonde in yoga pants stretching from the shoulder press machine. I'll be here all night. So glad I came high.
Ur here with me in spirit. Now run free. Run free
Turns out the guy I peed on gave me a ride back to my dorm this morning.
You are a god.
My mom has a bong in her bathroom, but no air freshener.
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
What happened lastnight it looks like I had sex with edward scissor hands....my back is so messed up
my bad i broke a mirror over your back
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