This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
I was fucking the girl and her best friend walked in on us. She said we looked thirsty, got us a glass of water, and poured it down both of our throats. It was like... sex bottle service
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
I just went through the Wendy's drive thru only wearing a towel. My life has hit an all time low
He made a playlist to use during sex...that ended with The Ultimate Warrior's entrance music.
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
Was Mr. ROBOT good? I missed it. I just fucked dental hygienist on the trampoline in my backyard
I couldn't really understand you because you were really quiet and I said "I don't know what you're saying, it's kind of a big mumble" and you said "that sums up my life"
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
Sorry I missed your call. I was in the shower washing away my sins and sweat. Please tell me you want to get drunk as shit later.
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
Randomize
