I just snorted a line of adderall through a rolled up business card for the Michigan Law Admissions Office.... Tell me I'm not motivated
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
Set off the fire alarm in our dorm at 2:30 am last night. 150 Naked people wrapped in towels shared a bag of popcorn with me as we watched the firefighters frantically search for my burnt popcorn in the building.
OMG THAT WAS YOU?!
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
This morning I learned I traded my sunglasses for a Big Lebowski sticker at the football game.
She keeps asking if I've seen him... For the last time YES... IN MY BED LAST FRIDAY NIGHT AND THEN AGAIN SATURDAY MORNING
can i text him and be like "oh yeah, forgot i kinda made out with a girl this weekend. For future reference, does this count as cheating?" ?
Witnessing a crazy lady on the bus screaming about how romney is one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse.
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
I would just like to go ahead and accept my slut of the year award.
It's like 10 times better than an Oscar
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
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