So yesterday I was on craigslist and I saw a listing for a sofa-cum-bed. I knew what they meant...
but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
I just saw a girl walking home wearing a tshirt, boxers, and cowboy boots. Thanks for having the decency to drive me to my car.
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
bringing a ziploc bag full of Jim Beam to the movies may not have been the best idea.
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
We need to step up our tailgating...they're here drinking out of a prosthetic leg
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
My ninety day supply of adderal just came in the mail and I literally just dumped all 180 pills into my hands and laughed like a maniac. Shits about to get cray
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
Your penis caused this!
you fell asleep with her panties on your face. how are you surprised??
Randomize
