How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
shes in my pool wearing only floaties on her arms ill have to raincheck watching march madness with you guys sorry
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
She poured beer through the deck into the hot tub. She called it a deck shot. It was horrifying but super awesome at the same time.
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
Let me tell you how my drug dealer wants me to take his girlfriends little sister to jr prom
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
"She's seriously grinding on him while whispering into his ear, 'take me to McDonald's.'"
How many fucks given?
0.12846
I'm just to the point my give a fucks is so far in the red that I'm going to have to take out a 30yr loan of fucks to repay it
Currently googling hangover cures, which looks a lot like working from the perspective of my boss.
Randomize