I want to take you away to a place of dolphin rides and hot stone massages.
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
I stayed at the bar and helped clean up cause I was told I'd get free shots. Didn't happen.
is it too much to get a jumbo margarita in a sippy cup right now?
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
Her voice kills me. Its the perfect pitch to fuck with my hangover.
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
I almost tried texting you with my pipe. Holy fuck this is good shit.
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
Just lectured your brother about using condoms when hooking up with girls he meets online. I should be a fucking life coach
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
Randomize
