So I thought I was doing pretty good and then I sneezed and prematurely ejaculated...
my mom just told me how she used to love having sex while stoned. wtf.
I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
I'm at Lowes and I'm constantly looking for things to vomit in, just in case
I hope, cuz I was gunna get "celebritory drunk" but now I have to get "I'm disappointed drunk"
If I don't wake up hungover in a ditch Monday morning I will consider my halloween a failure
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
Should I be worried if two ants just crawled out of my purse?
Yes!
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
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