Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
I cut holes in my blanket and put my arms through it. It's the sleeveless "Bro Edition" Snuggie.
At one point we asked the guy to play "the lion sleeps tonight" with his bagpipes. Best version ever.
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
It was darkish out, I was shit faced, and they should have marked the electric fence a little more clearly. The entire wedding reception saw me run full force into it
In your drunken glory you promised me, tongue, 12 naked pics, and 1,800 breakfasts.
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
I DONT HAVE THE SOCIAL SKILLS TO EXPLAIN THAT YOU DIED EATING MY PUSSY
Met a beautiful Irishman two nights in a row. I may never come back.
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