she was so not down for the gang bang
you kept trying to make scrambled eggs with 3 hardboiled ones.
this just has baby written all over it
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
you know its bad when everytime i put on a shirt i think of who i hooked up with in it
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
Slow dancing with the chandelier.
Reasonably certain my seventh grade teacher is encouraging me to drop acid on twitter
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
Okay, new plan. Get drunk, eat breadsticks. It's going to be great.
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
did you just correct my grammar and then send me a photo of your dick?
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
I stole the butter cup cuz i brought home my rolls and chicken and didnt want the butter everywhere. I miss your body because its amazing.
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