They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
He started yelling "we're making a baby" mid thrust.. probably not the right guy for me right?
last night this guy was hitting on me by showing me the famous people he had in his contacts on his cell... when he asked me if i knew lindsay lohan, i said "whose that? sounds asian"
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
Game over. He has a paternity test request on his table.
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
Just bought a beer belt to complete the Captain America outfit. I will do my part as a hero of America to pass out beer to the good citizens of America.
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
Is it weird that I want to have sex wearing my glasses and lab coat while having an actual scientific discussion?
Well i would have gone to the bar but Satan decided to hold his rituals in my uterus.
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
It true. It written in the Bible.
Yes I remember that, right next to the passage where jesus said unto his disciples, pop molly, fuck bitches amen
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
Randomize
