If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
oh my god I didn't know your sister was this good at french kissing
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
He just asked me if I wanted a ride on the "bologna pony." I never wanna have sex again...
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
She sucked my dick and I swear I almost had to send a search party into her mouth to find it. IT WAS THAT AMAZING.
I love you. We're gonna celebrate your 21st by putting people in duct tape bikinis and pushing them down tequila slip and slides
We hit a deer while we were singing an acapella version of "I will always love you"
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
Her son walked into the middle of the living room, took off his diaper, shit on the floor, smiled at me, and walked out, as if nothing happened.
So date night went well?
I had to reschedule my trainer meeting so now I'm just here eating hot pockets
HIDE THE INFLATABLE PENIS
try to milk me bitch
Randomize
