my dealer just handed me my weed in a pink easter egg
my momz letting me make the christmas card in photoshop
so that means christmas in space?
imma make our dead cats ghosts like obi wan kenobi
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
Two cats fucking in the middle of the street. I sat there and watched in my car because I didn't want to cock block the male by honkin my horn.
dude, im taking a shit and i just realized it's his MOM in the shower not him...oh fuck
Dad danced with a girl half his age and her boyfriend just sat at the bar and waited for dad to be done. I bought pity nachos.
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
don't bring your nerd jargon into this conversation about my naked body
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
I promised her I would shit on your driveway. There's nothing that you or I can do about it now.
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
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