i get turned down more than a collar. where are the desperate bitches i need to crawl to them
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
you make it seem like sunflower seeds and pinot grigio are not in the food pyramid.
a commercial for my antidepressant came on and they said you shouldn't take if if you drink right as i took a shot
god is laughing at you again
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
Thru out the entire phone conversation I went from thinking: he's making a gay come-on, to he's trying to sell me drugs, before realizing he was offering me a job with an internet company. Things are gonna be awkward in class this week.
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
i just saw that homeless guy who dresses like the cat in the hat at the liquor store. i guess he got enough change to have a good weekend. oh the places he'll go
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
He just asked me if he's allowed to flirt with me. That's how whipped he is.
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared."
Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout?
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
Stop thinking about me and go on your date... at least I got the glitter off your face first.
Randomize