Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
Last night started off great but became the saddest day of my life when i was drunk in a hotel room eating day old mac and cheese out of a yatzee cup with a coffee lid as a spoon...
we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
It's a lightpost hitting you in the head. Of course it's going to hurt the day after.
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
dude when im high using logic is an accomplishment that should be rewarded. make sure u get cinnamon twists
I'm going for high school drunk, you've got 15 minutes to get here.
Just did a "spirit of homecoming" bump off a stranger's credit card. A stranger that dropped us off at home. Erica's bad. How do allllll of the Eastern Europeans know how to find drugs so easily?!?
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
Don't do him, he's a Dolphins fan! A FUCKING DOLPHINS FAN!
My fire has petered out without you
My Peter has fired out without you
That might be the most romantic thing you’ve said to me, unfortunately.
I really wanted you to make me eggs this afternoon. I even wrote it on my hand to remind myself.
Randomize
