i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
i really regret not blowing your cousin before he went to jail
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
Did you send me a snapchat of your sister triple kissing two other girls?!!! You might be the greatest friend the world ever made
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
I HAVENT SEEN A PENIS IN 5 WEEKS I REFUSE TO REMAIN CALM
I told my manager that I would be coming in to work either high from edibles on purpose or tripping on acid by accident so he knows to check my work tomorrow.
He told me if he passed out to wake him by sitting on his face, and if he suffocated at least he would die happy. Found the one.
I just swallowed confetti and motor-boated some guys beard...#happy2015
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