We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
Im telling you now. Hang out with winning football players and you get whatever the hell you want. Sorry to wake you. But its important knowledge.
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
He said I was trying to make the bouncer dance with me AS he was throwing me out
how thoroughly do i need to sanitize the cone the vet put around my dog's neck for it to be safe to use as a beer bong?
Idk if you've ever had the pleasure of 1. Vomiting on a sidewalk - at 3 in the afternoon 2. Vomiting nachos or 3. Vomiting nachos out of your nose but really I do not advise any of the above.
you were sat in the corner crying until someone gave you a baguette, which you then tried to feed to the duck doorstop.
I regret nothing
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
He told me I had smoking hot areolas then he wins an executive of the year award. How does that even happen?
My husband gave me a key to his house. I thinks this means we're getting kinda serious.
Randomize