And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
Just got yelled at by a priest...again.
Next weekend I am getting a library card and staying my whore ass home.
I'm too hungover for some lady to talk to me about potatoes
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
I created a new solo drinking game. You need a handle, a laptop, and a shitty internet connection. Start watching the fort video in the que, play the snake while the videos constantly load, and take a drink everytime you fuck up. There was a video of a an asain female Justin beiber impersonator full screen when I woke up.
I legitimately forgot how to blow my nose just now. Sleep might be handy.
I have migrated to the couch. Minimal movement is still happening, but I should be mobile enough to go to the liquor store by eight.......so that good.
If by "Are you high?" u mean "Did you just pass out at Genghis Grill walking to your table and falceplant?" the answer is yes.
I wish we could all take a bath together. Not in a lesbian way. But in a relaxing drunk in the tub sort of way.
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
I'll be an awkward "I've had the grooms penis in my mouth" presence and we can party our nipples off.
I woke up to a gigantic ft-long tootsie roll and a note by drunk me with the words "you're welcome"
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