you should buy a sheep. A) you get an awesome pet. B) free coat
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
Just pulled an upper-decker at a hardware store. I believe I'm winning 8-2. It's obvious you don't shit enough in public.
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
He passed out with the ball in his hand so no one could play beer pong without him.
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
I've sold more douches working here than one man should sell in a lifetime
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
I offered to trade my cat for a bottle of tequila as long as it had a handle on it and realized I had a problem
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