i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
So I just found out that my mom and dad arent married
What? They have three kids?
Yep. And apparently I have a half brother. Happy Birthday to me
It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
Just saw a cop issuing a DUI. At 3 pm. It's definitely the start of winter break.
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
Yeah... I was considering changing that part but the boxed wine is non-negotiable.
Pretty sure I just convinced a drunk guy at the train station that I was from the future
I can feel my liver begging me to stop.
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
Well yeah. Plus. My dick looks awful. So I would need to do some extreme makeover dick edition before even starting something so ridiculous.
So, my eyeglasses somehow ended up in my nightstand drawer and they're covered in lube.
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
Randomize