Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
I wish i could 80s montage me losing weight
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
he broke off your car antennae to use as a walking stick before he smoked because he claimed to lack the facial strength needed to open his eyes when he's high
She wants to go as a facebook "like" for halloween, but right now her costume looks more like the hamburger helper hand with broken fingers.
My mom just told me my dad shaves his pubes while drunk and I don't know how to feel anymore.
You were drunk it couldn't have been that bad
I've never been drunk enough to enjoy getting a blister on my dick.
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
Do you realize we were driving someone else’s car and I was holding the wheel while you were driving and sucking my dick. That’s NOT normal
How did the test come back?
I've never been so happy to have a yeast infection. And i got a free pack of birth control
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