this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
I have a running excel spreadsheet detailing the number of shots in a night and subsequent ability to masturbate
I just egged your windshield and it froze on contact. Have fun with that.
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
he obviously didn't care that i was sleeping and dreaming about ellen degeneres knitting me a christmas sweater.
I just wanted to let you know that this afternoon I took a piss at the same toliet you drank out of on New Years Eve.
So my birthday was awesome. Only remember 45 min of it but I woke up with a girl on the couch and a half bowl of ground beef
I barely even remember him. He is just a distant beard in my past.
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
Randomize
