Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
Dude, I was completely sober last night, didn't puke on my shoes, went home with an incredibly beautiful girl, wore a condom, and didn't wake up in a puddle of urine this morning.
hah, sarcasm, classic
shes about as inviting as chlamydia
I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
you turned on the Care Bears movie at 5am and kept screaming "I CARE"
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.
The best part about this city is obvious. Someone saw me crouching by a bar pissing in my leftover Panera bread bowl and they just winked.
The ONE weekend I don't put anything up my nose, and it decides to bleed like crazy
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
On way back. With a shopping cart. Minimal casualties.
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
I just ran into my psychology professor at Planned Parenthood she asked why I was there and I asked why she was there and it turns out we both had a scare.#bonding because of abortion.
Randomize