sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
Yes, that was ME getting carried out of the club singing 'i believe i can fly'
Tell me right now I did the right thing by not fucking my sick gf at 3 am with her family home... Tell me my balls hurt for noble reasons.
I am sitting here. Drinking from a bottle of vodka. Eating shredded cheese from a bag and waiting on him to pick me up after he finishes with his girlfriend. This is what dreams are made of.
I was tied up in bed before noon, the rest of the day can go to hell.
Just googled "penis wearing a hat" i think it's safe to say nobody found my ex's lost phone...
Whatever, consider condoms an eighteen year investment.
I could probably save all of the money I would have spent on condoms and put a kid through college.
Pounded a bottle of Moscato in my underwear while watching Pretty Little Liars...am I really gonna be 30 next year?
Someone put pennies in the toilet. This isn't a fucking wishing well
Let the clothes fall where they may.
Panties = found
Randomize
