try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
tell ils to like buy her flowers and like a balloon that says, sorry I tried to fuck your sister. I think hallmark makes some of those cards too.
turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
if my vagina gave out awards, he should be preparing acceptance speaches for the oscar, the heisman and the nobel peace prize.
Vegas is awesome. Its like you have a kentucky accent girls automatically assume you don't have herpes.
But fine, we can play that game. You can come over and we can have totally platonic, long, boring discussions. Or we can fuck. Whatever.
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
forgot to tell you your neighbor walked out of her house this morning just as I was leaving shirtless
I may be a feminist, but I am not above using my body to distract you if it means I might beat you in a game of scrabble.
I was dreaming of a parallel reality and in the dream I just looked up at my present self and was like "you're high, man"
P.s. I wore your shirt today and it has your blood all over it, but I am at a funeral home and they are using embalming fluid to get your blood stains out right now.
Randomize
