i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
You remember those guys we called the police on after they stole our keg? Turns out one of them is a student instructor in one of my classes. Figuring out how best to use this information.
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
Walk of Shame'd halfway down a mountain, skiiers passing. Do not drink with lifties at the end of ski season.
Her inability to understand the word "moderation" is the achille's heel of an otherwise perfect human
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
I Have a huge scrape on my knee and I need a better excuse than dry humping on a park bench...
The only math I use in every day life is figuring out how much I can spend on alcohol and still have money to pay my bills. High school lied to us.
Its honestly only a matter of time before I punch him in the face... I'll try to control myself until you guys break up
I don't like pregnant me. I eat very large burritos, I don't like having sex and I can't even finish a Blue Moon.
I'm hung over and my mom made me go to church. I feel like such a sinner.
I need an aspirin and some dignity.
Randomize
