I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
Hookers taste better with whip cream
Maybe we ought to get some pennicillin too
Fair enough
See, not all bad decisions involve my penis.
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
I will always remember today as the day I narrowly escaped having to touch a tiny penis
I woke up with a black eye, bruised knuckles, wearing women's clothing, in a house I did not recognize, next to a solid 9. Thank you for making 21 special.
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
Mike showed up naked and in handcuffs. Again. Feel free to come over and laugh because I'm not helping this time.
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
One minute we were ordering sandwhiches. The next hes peeing in a trash can yelling at kids about how tv made him this way
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
That's when I realized I was probably naked in the wrong bed
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
Randomize
