i'm 85% sure that if you don't visit me i will do something awkward and potentially dangerous to you in your sleep involving chocolate milk and a sham-wow.
listening to techno makes your hand move faster while masterbating
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
Maybe shotgunning 4 days after oral surgery wasn't such a good idea after all...
Woke up this morning with seven juice boxes under my pillow and an empty box of condoms In my pocket. Good night.
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
sometimes after I smoke and the high has gone away...the high will come back like three hours later for a brief yet gripping ride.
that's usually when I end up in someone's house, having sex with someone else, while that someone's roommate makes us mozzarella sticks.
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
The only thing left on my Bucket List is getting fingered at an aquarium.
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
I used the phrase "love child of quasimodo and cyclops " in a sentence today.
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
HE PEED ON ME. THE MANAGER OF THE BAR.
Randomize
