On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
Oh and my new excuse for not being able to hook up is cholera, feel free to use it
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
Just described your amazing cock to a complete stranger. I am officially the worst wingman (chick) ever.
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
We decided to make playlists for each other. Do you know any songs that say "sorry I'm not as hot as your prostitute ex?"
Oh, AND I met a ukulele teacher that I'd date. So there's that.
I had to rename my dildo. I met a little kid who named his teddy bear the same name. It just felt wrong.
There's a kitten on my face and I'm druuuunk
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
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