Just saw a man jogging. For recreation. At 3am. Who's he training to be, batman?
I told them you could toss a salad like wolfgang puck
I had a dream you and I were having sex. It was pretty romantic.... until you started pulling out toys.
Do you know how easy it would be to shoplift if I was a magician?!
she smelled like a LAN party
I'm sorry, but the way we fuck, they don't make condoms strong enough not to break
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
I fell asleep after the worst sex of my life and now I'm snowed in with him. SEND HELP. CALL FEMA. GET ME OUT OF HERE.
Every time you visit for the weekend I end up having to bleach my entire house after.
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
I had to take on your role as drunk idiot....I have no idea how you do it so well and so regularly. That shit is exhausting.
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
Randomize
