a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
I had a pretty decent weekend -- aside from dropping the baby on her head. That.. That I feel bad about.
Two hours into move in day and the ambulance is here already.
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
Just when I decided to go get a taco and a blunt cake it starts raining. Coincidence? or divine intervention?
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
I'm serious-it was like trying to deep-throat a minivan.
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
there was a goddamn geisha at house. my dick feels more cultured.
We were watchin sharknado and we hooked up while I had the Donald Trump shirt on. She said she felt like he was staring at her
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
Our sex sesh was interrupted by a bunch of hobos fighting outside his apartment.
Randomize
