Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
I opened my door to go to class and all there was was a raccoon puking on the doorstep. In hindsight, it was a very accurate omen.
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
Hell hath no fury like a woman whose gay sidekick you insult
you were so blacked last night that you jumped in the lake fully clothed, then just went back to the bar and walked around like you weren't soaking wet.
If you're into enormous nipples, you should ask out my office's receptionist.
Well, I can't remember Thursday and my left ass cheek hurts like hell, I'm guessing Mike's bachelor party was a success.
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
Randomize
