Is there a nice way to say "I like you, but I hate your dick?"
You're just mad at the fact that I want to be a car alarm.
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
its weird that my cat bites every fat chick i bring home. i repeat every fat chick, qhT KINDA FRIEND ARE YOU
The guys in the quick check just recognized me as the girl who bought rolling papers and whipped cream. This is the walk of shame on crack.
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
just give up on your dreams and come get shit house drunk with me.
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
Randomize
