He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
I just peed in the Schreyer honors college shrubbery. Thanks honors students, you're finally good for something
APPARENTLY giving your friend one of your shoes so that you avoid the no shoes no service rule makes you drunk...
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
I am literally missing a chunk of eyelashes. That's how fun it was.
And all I wanted you to do is stand there and sing who let the dogs out.
So me and him are making out, and the other two are on the couch behind us. he randomly stops kissing me and goes "oh god I think she just took off her shirt" I look behind me and I see her tits flapping up and down. This man has amazing senses..
You puked on my feet last night. You owe me a pedicure.
I wanted to make fun of someone saying that to an untrained ear, skrillex is blah blah blah. But it was too soon after they said it. And now I can't find it. These are real problems.
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
Um..... I have taste. The only thing I am going to bedazzle is my vagina.
I was so drunk I asked my mom if she had always been my mom or if it was someone else for a while
I'm just happy stripping was the reason you fractured your hand
Randomize
