You just compared our sex life to a seven year old kid.
After work we went home to fool around. Turns out he had sawdust under his foreskin. I'm never going down on him again.
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
The google font looked peculiar last night, but then up close I realized it was just dry vomit.
making your facebook status TEQUILA is like basically saying "im easy tonight. feel free to take advantage"
But I love Penises too much to give up on them. My phone capitalized Penises. It's like it knows I respect them
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
I’m pregaming Christmas shopping with grandma. What’s up?
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
Randomize
