I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
We should have parties more often. I ended up with 90 beers and someone cleaned my toilet.
it's like heaven, but drunker
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
we put a pacifier in your mouth because you kept drunkenly singing country music.
Woke to a half burnt 20 in my pocket, covered in mud, clothes all wet, so im assuming I didn't use that 20 you gave me for a taxi
I was in my bathroom taking a shit and my mom just opened the door, walked in, handed me a fudgesicle, and left without saying a word. Yeah. That just happened.
See, it wasn't that I broke my nose having sex. Its that I forgot about the bedposts...
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
Please tell your sister I apologize about saying her baby may have beef curtains. That was inappropriate.
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
Steven and I talked about running for office again today. It's fucked that my 3 dream jobs are marijuana bakery owner, bar owner, and president.
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