This is the worst date ever. Pls kill me. No, wait, scratch that, stick to the original plan of killing Paris Hilton, I'll live though this
she said "lets play dickbreaker!" and then threw my blackberry at my dick as hard as she could.
A freshman just referred to Home Improvement as 'tim the tool man show'. People born after 1990 are not people.
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
I just sat in the bathtub with the shower running so I could eat the whole box of mega stuffed Oreos. What am I doing with my life
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
Today is going to be a great day. He just brought me a donut on his dick... It's Sticky Dick Donut Day!!!
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
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