Racial profiling caused me to miss two cabs but the third cabs the charm - he's playing Jesus Music
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
Sharing a bathroom with a guy sucks. I always have to set an alarm for the middle of the night just so I can take a dump. Poop text btw
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
I am sorry, you're response was not recognized. Please try again.
Imma do me. And by that, I mean I'm going to walk across campus still drunk at 9am on a Tuesday.
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
Apparently "dick me" was not the response he was looking for.
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
75% of the time I swipe right on Bumble for girls over 40 is because I think their 18 year old daughter is hot.
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
My party ended early and I have a mountain of shrimp and weed
I peed in my closet, which at the time looked like a sparkly bathroom...
Randomize
