How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
Just pulled my keys, cell-phone and a pack of cigarettes out from between my cleavage. This one guy's face was priceless.
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
i remember introducing him to all my posters and making him be extra nice to frank sinatra and bob dylan before he fucked me
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
Cognac is not meant to be taken in shots. I just wanted you to know the desperation of last night.
My TA just came over to give us drugs. Now he's drinking grey goose with my roommate and explaining his thesis to her. This is too much.
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
I made a booty call at 3:30 am on a Monday... I think I just became the ultimate female fuckboy. I don't know whether to be ashamed or get myself a trophy.
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
So a bottle of lube exploded all over my softball bag and Nike shirt.
I don't even remember what dignity looks like anymore. I JUST WANTED TO ROAST SOME POTATOES
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