I just had my first uncircumcised penis. I kept staring at it like the foreskin was going to fall off on its own.
the only thing i remember last nigh is talking to some chick for thirty minutes about cheese.
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
Just stole a goat. Bringing it to your house to cock block. Blame the goat not me.
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
The cop told us he we helped him pass his monthly bong quota. He almost ran out of room on the hood of his car..
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
i gave up on the vacation being fun the night i ate all the marshamallows out of the lucky charms while everyone else was having sex in the condo
woke up next to the new dishwasher. set the record for banging a new employee to 6 hours...i should be a professional sexual predator
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
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